Just when I felt that everything was smooth-sailing, things had to make a turn for the worse. Yesterday, planned to go to H.I.S International and Star Holidays with HIM to make payment for his tour group accommodation in Penang and Kuala Lumpur on 30 April and 1 May respectively.However, in the end, he asked he will go to H.I.S himself and asked me to go to Star Holidays myself as he has to attend a meeting later in the afternoon. Wants to have as early a rest as possible. I agreed.Woke up early to prepare breakfast for him. Make chicken sandwich.He decided to head home first and return to Amara again later for the meeting. Waited for me outside Tanjong Pagar market after his trip to H.I.S.Passed him the sandwich when I reached."You made it? I do not want to die of food-poisoning."The next thing I did was to throw the whole bag of sandwich into the dust-bin."Stubborn!" was what he said.Walked to Star Holidays, without talking much to him.Reached the agent, waited for Zu to prepare the hotel voucher for us. He was nagging and nagging the whole time.Was pissed already. Made me even more pissed with his nagging.After leaving the travel agent, walked to Chinatown, WITHOUT talking to him at all. Although he was trying very hard to make me talk.Took a bus to City Hall MRT station, where he head for home and I head for work. Asked him whether he wanted to have lunch before we parted. He did not reply at all.After we parted, as I was walking to work, I called him. Asked him what was he angry with then. He sounded quited angry, and said whatever I do is none of his business anymore, and vice versa. Then the line got cut off. I called him a few times, but was diverted to voice mail immediately. I thought he had did it on purpose!Ran to find him at the platform, wiping the tears on my face away as I ran.Received a message from him, saying that his handphone's battery has gone flat. I had mistaken him... =)He was still waiting for the MRT to come when I reached. Could not voice out still as to why was I so angry then. Managed to persuade me to go to work. Messaged him, telling him why was I angry and how I was feeling then.Scared... Really really scared...Sat at the playground at my house downstairs when I came back from work. Was crying through-out the time I was there. Both angry and scared...Talked to him, and he apologized. I thought things would be better already then.However, today, was suppose to meet him at 9pm. Called him to wake up at 7pm. But, he only got up at 7.45pm.Called me at 8.30pm, said he has just bathed. Will reach around 9.30pm. Pissed.Called him then, he was still in the MRT. He only reached slighty before 10pm. Called him twice. The second time I called him, I asked him to go to work straight-away. He refused.Was very angry when he arrived. Like yesterday, did not talk to him much. Walked all the way to Raffles Place MRT station to take the MRT to work for him and home for me. DAMN!!! Do not know why am so short-tempered towards him these two days. He said because of the fear I have in me. Is it true? Perhaps...Went to Toa Payoh to buy some chocolates to eat. After that, I seemed to have cooled down. =) Messaged him to tell him about it.Sorry darling... I spoilt our date today... Really was in a foul mood and temper. Hope that things will be better the next time we meet.First time when we meet four times in a week!!! =) If only everyday was like the beginning of this week. If only we are able to meet almost everyday like this week... If only...
{&i'll hold on till the end of time-}
3:36 PM
For the past 2 days, have been meeting up with HIM after work.On Monday, after work, went for a bite with Adeline. Went to eat at Polar cafe. Chatted for sometime there as well...After that, she went to do some shopping on her own. I took the MRT to Yishun. WE planned to watch Chandramukhi in the night. Wanted to do so on Sunday evening. But he was too tired after work. He did not have much rest the day before. After alighting me at check-point, he had to go and fetch his brother to the hosiptal, drive the car back home and come back to go to work. Poor thing...Bought the tickets, shop around while waiting for 8pm to come. Time to wake him up. However, he called me at 7.30pm. Met at around 8.30pm.He was really enjoying the show at first, before the break. It is acted by the popular actor, who only act once every 5 years, according to him. That is why the ticket cost $15 per person!!!We chatted abit during break-time. Suddenly, the topic of me suspecting of having a baby came about. I do not know how come I could have this feeling and thought then. He was faster than me!!! Wanted to discuss it with him after the show. But...It really dampened his mood. Could not concentrate on watching the movie anymore.Discuss alot about it after the movie. He looked really really lost... helpless... Almost cried I guess... He insist that the baby cannot be kept. But I insist that no way am I going for any abortion. That is if it really happens. Promised him to go for a test to see whether or not it is true.That very night, I found out that I am not. Should I be happy or sad?But I do not know why, I lied to him that I am not sure of the outcome. Because of this, he did not sleep the whole night. So sorry my dear... I do not know why I did it too.Yesterday, in the afternoon, messaged him and told him I am not having any child. He asked if I was lying in the beginning. My answer was no. Part of it was the truth. I really have the thought initially.Wanted to and watch another movie in the evening. But I did not want to. Wanted to meet him and talk things through. Went to pack his room. Decided to take a nap after that. Asked me to go home first and meet him only at 7pm. Did just that...Met him at Yio Chu Kang MRT station and went to Little India for dinner. Through-out the journey, we talked quite a fair bit. He has been coughing out blood and has traces of blood in the urine. For about a month and only now he told me!!! Wanted so much to bring him to see the doctor. Was very very worried then... But it was rather late already then. Cannot think of any clinic in town that is open. Promised me that he will go for a check-up today.Also talked about us now, what will we become in the future. I realise, I really really cannot let go of him. Am in love with him more and more each day...After dinner, went to Mustafa Centre to take a look at the VCD player for his car. He claims that I promised to buy him one and have to do so next month. If I get my upselling allowance for January to March that is. ***Prays hard now***She called him... He called her back... I just walked slightly ahead of him, trying my best to look as normal as I can.After he hang up the phone, he turned and tell me, "I finally get to see how a girl's face is like when she is jealous."?!?!?! Caught in the act. Tried to deny but I know he will not believe... =)We took the MRT to Chinatown, as he needed to go to the loo badly. From there, we walked to Amara.Saw a number of familiar faces yesterday. In MRT, in the way to Chinatown, saw his homtown friend. At Chinatown bumped into Mei. While walking to Amara, saw an ex-chef of Amara. Was thinking hard what did he worked as in Amara. Thought he was a part-timer at first...He went for a check-up straight away after work today. Found out he got gastric ulcer. Take great care my dear...Just talked to him awhile ago... Suddenly mentioned about the skirt Jie Yin and Jie Min bought for me as a birthday gift last year. And I just wore it today!!! So coincident... Is it??? It has been quite some frequent that we both have the same or similar thoughts and actions lately... =)For the past few days, ever since we went to Kuala Lumpur, I have been living in bliss. Feels like the good old days. Can we be like this forever? Will he be mine and only mine again eventually? God knows...I will be right here waiting for you sweetheart...
{&i'll hold on till the end of time-}
2:06 PM
I am back!!! Let me continue where I left off yesterday.After dinner, went to walk around. Brought me to the place where all the pubs and clubs are. Just around the corner of our hotel. Told him I have not been clubbing ever since I was with him. =)Wanted to go for a spin around Kuala Lumpur. However, he did not bring his car key along. And also because we are rather tired. He has not slept for the whole day and have to wake up early in the morning the next day.Went to take a look at Hard Rock Cafe, located at the lobby of our hotel before returning to the room to sleep.He left at 6am yesterday while I continued to sleep till around 9.30am. Heidi called me. Everything has been finalized. Wondering what am I referring to? Have been helping him to look for accommodation in Penang and Kuala Lumpur. He will be brining a group of 27 people over for holiday during the Labour Day holiday. Because of this, we quarrelled a lot of times. And I really mean A LOT!!! But it was all worth it. =) Because to me, if you are not someone who mean alot to me, I will not even bother to quarrel with you. Why? Because whatever you do will not affect me in any way at all. Undestand?Anyway, I managed to find accommodation for him for the two places already. Wil be going to make payment at the two travel agent on Thursday.Went to bathe and wanted to go down for breakfast. However, was given the wrong information by the telephone operator. Had to call him to ask him something about the group. But was unable to call out. Called the operator for assistance. At the same time, ask them what time is breakfast buffet served till. 11am was their reply.Went down at 10.30am. Got stuck in the lift. The door refuse to open when it reaches the lobby. Luckily one maintance guy was with me then. Otherwise I would have panicked and cried in the lift!!! Took the lift to level 1 and thank god the lift door open.Headed to the coffeehouse and was told that they are closed already for breakfast. They closed at 10.30am everyday. Only at 11am on Saturday and Sunday. Damn!!!Went back to the room. Ate the biscuits we bought the previous night. Then, went around the hotel taking photographs. When I wanted to return to the room, the lift was faulty again. The card access could not work!!! What a hotel...After that, headed to KLCC. After seeking guidance from the bellboy, decided to take the train. However, I mistook him. I thought it was the monorail. Went up, asked them the station to alight to go to KLCC. But was told to cross the road to take the train at the other side. Went over, asked the same question.The guy replied, "You see the Cadbury building over there. You have to take the train behind the building to go to KLCC."DAMN!!!On my way there, met this UK couple. They were finding their way to the train station as well. Told them I am going there as well and led the way. Was not very sure if I am heading the right way though. Just tried my luck. Chatted with the lady through-out the walk to the train station.Spent a total of 5 hours walking around KLCC. Ate McDonald's for lunch as I wanted to drink their milk-shake. So miss it. In Singapore, very few places, definitely not McDonald's, do have milk-shake I guess.Although I shopped for 5 hours, I bought nothing much though. Just 2 tops for him, a top and skirt for myself. Bought air freshener for his car and magazine for me to read in the room while waiting for him to return.Took a short nap upon reaching the room. After that, on the television and read the magazine.At around 9pm, was feeling real bored already. Messaged him. He had just left his friend's house.Decided to go to the business centre to log on to the Internet. (See previous post). I did sat around to listen to the band play for awhile. Then I went up to the room again to watch television.He finally came back at 12.30am. After bathing, he fall asleep. But I was hungry and also because I did took a nap earlier on, I could not get to sleep. I only ate the biscuits and chocolate we bought the night before for dinner.Tossed and turn in bed for almost the whole night. Guess he was real tired. No matter how much I shaked the bed, it did not affect his sleep at all. =)When I managed to fall asleep, he had to wake up and talk to me. There goes my sleep.Woke up at 10am, bathed and went for breakfast. After that, packed our stuff and left for home.Wanted to drop by somewhere to buy some food stuff and toileteries home. But, on our way to Johor Bahru, his brother called. His mother-in-law has admitted to hospital. He had no transport to go to the hospital. The rest of the family had left in a car and there was no more seat left for him.He alighted me at the check-point and drove home.It was a well-spent time with him I must say. If only this could happen forever...
{&i'll hold on till the end of time-}
8:23 AM